What you need to know about true love

Published 17.06.2024 | By Йосиф

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What you need to know about true love

To love is to truly know, recognize, and assume that people have as many faults as virtues, that certain customs may make us uncomfortable, that not everything is a bed of roses, and that we are not living in a fairy tale.

True love is something that transcends the coincidences of love. Sincere and true love is a strong love for differences. It means being tolerant of what the other person is doing and opening doors to trust.

We can’t say that we really care about someone until we know their demons, rage, anger and contradictions. When we truly love, we understand that a relationship is not just about beauty. There’s also chaos and dynamite with it.

Loving means coexisting with each other while taking care of various details, building puzzles and aerial towers of hopes and disappointments.

Keys to maintaining a healthy relationship

To truly love is a challenge. The first step is to get rid of all these assumptions that prevent us from seeing the realities of love.

1. Fall in love with yourself and life itself, and then fall in love with whoever you want.

In order to care for someone without dependence or necessity, you must first appreciate yourself. This means that to say “I love you,” you must first say “I love myself.” Self-love and self-knowledge are the keys to creating healthy relationships. To find the right person, we need to prepare for a relationship. This involves internal work, which can be laborious, but will have great benefits.

“If Love were a tree, the roots would be your self-love. The more you love yourself, the more fruit your love will give to others and the longer it will last.”- Walter Risso-

2. Love without conditions and exceptions

It’s natural and normal that you won’t like everything about your partner. Differences make love beautiful and fulfilling. If we only care about what we like, or the way we idealize things, love will not last, as we are all beings full of lights and shadows.

3. Love is not a need, but a preference.

Dependence and care are so contradictory that if we force them to coexist, they destroy each other. No one has the responsibility to fill in what we lack. When our love is based on preference rather than need, we value our partner for who he is, not what he provides.

This point is closely related to the first. That is, we must work and take care of ourselves so that we do not fall into the “need” of someone to cover our wounds and eliminate our mistakes. The key to true love lies in ourselves.

4. Being the perfect couple doesn’t mean having no problems, but knowing how to solve them.

Sometimes we make the mistake of believing that for love to work, a relationship must have no problems, no disputes. We need to understand each other 100%. Care, however, means facing the good and the bad without any anesthetic. We must face reality exactly as it is and solve our problems through respect, compromise and stability.

5. Love doesn’t grow out of nothing, it builds up.

To build love, we need to form a team and establish the rules of the game. To get into it, we need to know that communication, sincere listening, empathy and open dialogues are needed.

6. To love fully, you need to set emotional boundaries.

A healthy relationship is not based on power games or conditions, but on joint, balanced and healthy goals. So we need to get rid of the idea that care implies sacrifice. There are some things we should not tolerate, such as abuse, betrayal, emotional manipulation, or abuse of our values. They are all based on a lack of respect and care, so rejecting them means not stepping over our emotional boundaries.

7. True love does not require, it offers

Care is not a control or a requirement, it is freedom and trust. However, emotional bondage is much more common than we like to admit. That is why we must remove the condition of victims and the reproaches that try to justify bad actions or words. This type of behavior keeps us trapped in a negative spiral that feeds our relationship with darkness, mistrust, and false expectations.

If we have to sacrifice a part of ourselves and our lives to be with someone, then that love diminishes. Love is based on the respect and individual growth of each member of the relationship.

If Love Hurts, then we confuse feelings and destroy ourselves. So if we’re drowning, it’s time to go out and get some air. We must not change, take another form for the sake of our partner. We have to accept that we haven’t found a shoe our size. If our relationship brings grief, the best thing we can do is give it up.
Teodora Pavlova

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